Realization

Realization is a good thing. Like when you are a kid and you realize you can’t fly, and you realize that when you hit the floor from jumping off the couch. It’s good we realize that before we have the means to get to places like Angel Falls to test our “I can fly” theory. Realization sometimes comes in an envelope- like my bank statement “I just realized I’m definitely not rich!”
For me my most recent realization came yesterday out in the woods of New Hampshire while I was trying to stay on JJ’s wheel out on the trails of Davis Hill. The realization was twofold- my dryer hadn’t shrunk my jersey (I am fat) and two- I’m woefully out of shape.
Of course I had known this, and I had actually done a shameful thing on Saturday, I skipped a race I was signed up for- Crank the Kanc, as I knew I was going to get blown up. Now I did have some actual reasoning, as I came to the realization that I have two small children and didn’t have a game plan for what they were going to do while I went and raced my bike (K was working and my parents weren’t home- obviously I put in major effort in finding a solution).
Instead I took the girls out for a ride, Emma on the trail-a-bike and Bean on her bike. It was fun, a good day of just cruising. We stopped an visited my grandmother and then I took the girls to lunch. I can’t say it was an “epic” ride or a great “training” session, but it was a great ride in its own way. Then yesterday I got out for a ride with JJ and got schooled. I had hoped his legs would have been shredded from his Crank the Kanc effort the day before, but if they were then I feel even worse about my current fitness!
Of course the tremendous upside- I’m going to get faster and lighter, so I do have progress in front of me! The other good news, my broken ass is feeling much better. I am realizing that I am thinking about my ass wayyyyyy too much, I’m worried about falling on it and that is actually increasing the likelihood that I will wreck- man I hate that. I think that fear will subside a bit, especially if I can get out and spend some more time riding in the woods.
So that is the situation as it stands. Now it’s time for the whining and excuse making to come to an abrupt halt- or at least that is my current realization.

Later,
DEA